Poor Kid...

So, Nic Cage and wife have a new son. Ok, congratulations. Proud day to be sure. Oh, what’s the new kid’s name you ask? Are you sure you want to know? Ok, Cage named his son Kal-El Coppola Cage. Kal-El. No, that’s not a typo. He really named his kid that. Coppola as a middle name would be bad enough, but understandable. But Kal-El?! Did you realize what you just did to the poor kid? For those who may not know, Kal-El is Superman’s real name on his home planet of Krypton. So, basically Cage named his son after Superman – a comic book character. And not just any comic book character. Superman – probably the most famous one of them all. Now, anyone who has read my blog knows I’m into comics as a hobby and have nothing against them. I think the normal derision reserved for comic fans is somewhat undeserved and that a lot of good writing is being missed by a lot of people who think comic books are some lower form of ignorable literature. But that’s another topic for another day. The thing here is the name that kid is saddled with for life. I mean, if you want to name your kid after Superman, why wouldn’t you go with his secret identity on earth – some form of Clark Kent. At least the kid wouldn’t have to go through life either explaining his name or avoiding the laughter and you’ve still given a nod to Supes. But no, that would be the logical thing to do. Overall, what is up with celebrities going off the deep end when naming their kids? It certainly reinforces the notion that they live in a bubble completely unaware of the real world. Gwyneth Paltrow named her kid Apple. Apple?! Reportedly because the kid’s cheeks look like apples. I guess. Try explaining that when you’re 17. This all reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where George revealed his ‘perfect’ name for a kid, should he ever have one, and it was ‘7’. 7 as in Mickey Mantle’s jersey number. In the show, his fiancé completely derided it and made fun of it while talking to a pregnant friend who thought it was great and wound up naming their kid 7, much to the dismay of George. Are we really running out of names? What’s next? You name a kid Apple, why not Prune? If Kal-El, why not J’onn J’onzz, Rogue, or if it’s stateside, Captain America? Why not just pick some letters, through them together, and voila – a new name! Whatever….good luck Kal-El, you’re going to need it…